My great friends and I – well minus one since she had to do her laundry – two of them anyway, decided to eat dinner out and unwind at Starbucks afterwards. Some people go to a bar to unwind we get high on blended cold coffee and great conversation. Actually it turned out to be an intervention for me and MelMel. Shadow is our wisdom wellspring for advice.

Let’s begin with MelMel since her situation is much easier to understand. She was introduced, the way people get introduced nowadays, through a friend. The difference here is that we have a little “you’ve got mail” going on. The guy is in another continent. Hence it is a long distance thing. In my general opinion, long distance is never easy. Everything is going well so far and I am very happy for MelMel. The only hang up here is she is unsure and would not want to fall too fast for this guy.

The advice Shadow and I could give is just to enjoy the attention. There is really no need to fall to hard and too fast. We told her that it would only make a difference if he arrives earlier than expected. I have a gut feeling that he will, may be around October if everything continues to go well and he falls for her. I really think he already has, Shadow agrees. We just have to wait and see. I’ll keep you posted.

I, on the other hand, am in a more complicated situation. To make the long story short and I know what a cliché the line is but I will use it anyway, I am addicted to the comfort and affection given to me by someone who has always been honest that he is not ready for anything more than just friendship. There were many a rocky moments between us and it ended by us being friends. But where is the problem here?

The real problem is he keeps crossing the friendship boundary but the worst part of it is I like it – that makes everything so pathetic for me. I already knew that I have no place in his heart and yet I keep trying to ram myself in. I basically keep slamming into the wall he built around himself. I feel like he’s punishing me for what happened with him before with the other women he loved. Hence I find myself in a very messy situation. When I ask for affection he is not afraid to give it but I know that there is nothing behind the whole thing. He is a drug I cannot seem to quit. Every time I take a hit I feel wonderful but when left to myself I feel the full side effects of the downward spiral.

It was humiliating to relate my latest folly to my best of best friends. Of course they did not hesitate to tell me how stupid and pathetic I was being. This is the test of great friends – when they are not afraid to tell you to your face that you are being stupid you know you are in good company. After telling me that I was being stupid and pathetic, they said I already knew what I needed to do about the whole situation. Distance is needed here – rehab.